Bargin of the Day

Saw this advertisement today at the bottom of the page on yahoo sports......think someone has some wishful thinking lol.

New York Mets Playoff Tickets
For a limited time only all Mets Playoff Tickets are reduced.
www.NewYorkMets.TicketsNow.com

All I can say is a fool and his money are soon departed....yeah the smack talk is starting early.

WTF? Part Two

Barry Bonds in Drag.....ok that is just fundamentally wrong, nice ink Barry.

Who'd of Thunk

Let's see....... show your bitchy side one night, and shed a few tears the next and what do you get?.......The New Hampshire Primary evidently. Personally I didn't think she had a soft side...go figure.

WTF?

Can I get an Amen?

Ok, so I was in Walmart the other day….yeah I know that’s where I made my first mistake..but anyway, I am strolling through the junior department and that’s where I found what well, I don’t even know, cant even describe it…there are no words for this….well actually it speaks volumes really………..


And this is what it says……….
Hi, Mom, you know, I'm 13 years old now and I've decided that selling my pussy is the direction I'm leaning to take with my life since you obviously don't want me to be happy because you refuse to buy me a cell phone. Like, whatever! With the help of messages like this courtesy of America’s favorite retailer, I know the important things in life, like, cool clothes and cash, cash, cash. And, in the end, I gotta work the snatch to get it. Oh and there are some really cool clear stripper shoes in the shoe department too, I mean everyone is wearing them Mom.
Seriously what has raising a teenager girl come to when parent’s goals are to keep their daughters off the poles? I feel sorry for you Greg, be strong man, and keep the guns loaded!

Yes Revenge Can Be Sweet

Ran across this during my ritual Sunday night Post Secret habit, OK obsession, I admit it I am hooked on that site, I even got the book "A Lifetime of Secrets" for Christmas. Anyway laughed my ass off when I read this one..............

Red Neck Christmas

That's right parents you might want to cover the kiddies eyes when you drive past this lovely dipiction of Rudolph and one of his other reindeer friends being hung upside down from a tree and gutted.....what is it they say? Oh yeah... you can't fix stupid.

Conscia Mens Recti

I’ve said in my blog before that my Dad introduced me to this game I love called baseball when I was six years old. And I don’ t exaggerate when I say “l Love This Game”. I really do. But I am also old school, I feel in love with the game and a team, when there were genuine players that played because they loved the game. I know some of you don’t get it, but there is a difference …and if you are a baseball fan and you have never experienced it or witnessed that then you have missed out on something unique.

I grew up loving the game during a time when the players were accessible, when you could go to batting practice at the park and actually talk to the players, get autographs, write them letters and they actually hand wrote you a letter back. I remember winter autograph appearances where you didn’t have to pay to get your baseball signed, the players did it for free, imagine that today... When the field was filled with young players who paid their dues on the farm teams and earned their way to the big field. They made Detroit their home both during the summer and the off season. That’s what I mean about being old school.

I think, well I know baseball has changed since my induction to the game at the tender age of six. And I think the biggest thing is the lack on integrity of many players. Simply defined integrity is playing the game with moral uprightness and honesty. I think there is good evidence of the lack of said characteristics in any game, just read the newspaper or watch ESPN and examples of athletes lacking integrity and morals and how it affects their life on the field and in their personal lives.

Maybe I am naive, but I simply believe that if you have integrity as an athlete you will be able to walk securely, and in turn you won’t be the topic of scandals, rumors or gossip, or better yet named in a 400 page plus report by a certain ex-Senator. Athletes who decide to cut corners, gain an advantage, in essence cheat, yes I said CHEAT, will not only be discovered but will pay the ultimate price……loss of credibility and integrity. I mean in the end it’s all we’ve got….I strongly feel they are words that should hang over the locker of every professional baseball player.

For what seems like an eternity, we’ve had to hear about the stories of Bonds and his alleged steroid use, and honestly I am sick of hearing it. Not because I don’t care but because it’s like beating a dead horse. But now he has company in his House of Roids….I am actually surprised and relieved by the Mitchell Report. Surprised that there were only 80 names listed, and relieved that only one of my boy’s was accounted for , although I knew he’d show up.

But overall I feel sorry for these men who despite their deceitful efforts, gained nothing….because in the end their word, character, and integrity have been tainted along with all their record breaking feats. And according to this old school girl, a man’s word and integrity is one thing you can’t buy, is not easily repaired and sure as hell can not be injected.

The best we can hope for is some scar tissue and a vague memory of the pain.

(The Title is Latin, yes, I took latin, google it to see the translation)

Someone is Stepping On A Crack Somewhere

More like stomping on them... why? Because my back is killing me.So much that I had to go to the ER for a shot of morphine on Sunday. Which by the way that stuff provides for a mighty fine high. Now I know why people can get addicted to that shit. You certainly don't feel any pain that for sure.

However it also lovers my IQ about 60 points making me borderline retarded and totally unmotivated. Lucked out Monday and got a day off work because of a snow day and took Tuesday off to recover. So by Wednesday I was pretty much strung out on drugs just trying to make it through the school day with out falling asleep, rambling incoherently or drooling on myself...I for see an MRI in my near future...ugh

Update:
I went to the chiropractor Monday got an adjustment and felt a little better, took some more drugs, got another adjustment on Thursday and feel good as new. Some say that chiropractors are quacks, but right now, I think mine should win the Nobel Peace Prize...What? If Al Gore can win one so can my Chiropractor!

How NOT To Start Your Weekend

By getting a call from your Assistant Principal an hour into your weekend break telling you that one of your students who spend the day in the office was hauled out of school the last hour of the day in Handcuffs by the police.

And if that wasn't enough, that you need to set up a meeting with your team, the school psychologist, social worker, school liaison officer and parent for Monday Morning. Oy Veh
Somedays I hate my job.

Which is Funnier?

Getting decked by a fan or...............................................


Getting a nut job from your team mate and having it photographed and spread around the world by evil bloggers like myself............

My vote is the nut job of course

Happy Hanukkah

Happy First Night of Hanukkah

You Know It's Cold When...

You are sitting in your house wearing a hoodie sweatshirt and you pull the hood up over your head, I know just turn the heat up right? Well considering I am breaking the bank on all the christmas lights I have plugged into every wall socket, I can't exactly afford to crank up the heat.

We are getting the first real snow fall of the season tonight...just wish it would have come tomorrow night..god I need a snow day!

A Thought to Ponder....

admit it you chuckled just a little, or maybe you cringed..either way you reacted

In Case You Wondered......

Why bicycle shorts are always black!!


And NOT Red


Holy Hell that shit should be illegal!!!

Fun with words

Working with special needs students can be exhausting to say the least, however it can also be rewarding and well more importantly entertaining. Since the majority of my students can only read at the third grade level, (they are in eighth grade) I'm required to teach them phonics daily from a district approved curriculum. The lesson from the unit I am teaching this week involved the students writing sentences from a list of vocabulary words provided in the lesson. Today's vocabulary words included the following:

rubdown
nuts
bathtub
trucker
bunkbed
gushing
walnuts

Are you kidding me people??? I teach middle schoolers! Seriously people I couldn't make this shit up if I tried....I am sure you can imagine what kinds of sentences I'd end up with. Needless to say I didn't assign this to my kids, however I am assigning it to my readers...that's right You have homework! So get busy and write me some sentences!!! Can't wait to see if you make the grade.

My Nightmare Before Christmas

I have to admit, I'm one of those women...that's right I actually went shopping on black Friday. I know, I know, crazy. But well I wasn't alone in my insanity, that's the problem. Now I very rarely do the early bird post Thanksgiving sale, maybe oh I'd say every 5 years or so. And its usually only if there's something that's a really incredible deal. In this case a $300 item for $99.

I have to admit I'm a rookie and I don't hold a candle to those professional bargain hunting women who will stop at noting to get that last coveted item they are looking for. It's all good thought, to each her own, but what bugged me the most were the women and men who dragged their children out in the wee hours of the morning to help them snag their booty. I can't tell you how many kids I saw loaded down with mesh sacks strapped to their chests stuffed to the brim with clothes, and toys. And if that weren't enough these glorified pack mules were also expected to drag king size pillows in each hand (after all they were buy one get one free) as they struggled to find their way through the maze of people toward the check out lane.

I swear these women would sell their child's soul to the devil himself for the chance to qualify for a free $10 Kohl's gift card. Seriously people get a grip! Let you children stay home in their footed P.J's all snuggled under their blankets dreaming of all those presents Santa, AKA Ninja Shopper Mom, will be placing under the tree. Silly me but I think that dragging you child shopping with you kinda puts a crimp in the whole Santa story line.

If I were a betting kinda gal, I'd wager that the one item that those women broke their necks to find will be the least appreciated and played with gift received.I guess this is a prime example that the thrill of the hunt is more exciting than the kill itself.

How Do You Get An OSU Grad Off Your Front Porch?

In Wolverine country, we take the Michigan-Ohio State rivalry seriously. When you apply for your drivers licence in Michigan you are required to take an oath to hate the Ohio State Buckeyes for life and seal such oath by signing your name in blood. We're not nice to Bucknuts that invade our town every other year, not by any means and if you dare to wear scarlet and gray then you have earned yourself some choice words from the Michigan faithful, or maybe even a stray water balloon tossed in your direction.

But you buckeyes take it up a notch, to a seemingly sicking level sometimes. Buckeye fans have been known to assault opposing fans while the Columbus cops turn a blind eye. To Ohio State fans, a sucker punch is an acceptable form of behavior when a Michigan fan is on the receiving end.

That's not rivalry. That's just being an ass, but what do you expect from a Buckeye. last I checked physical intimidation was not a legit reason why Columbus is a tough place to play.

The same dichotomy (It's a big word, I know. Ohio State students, I recommend dictionary.com.) applies to the respective athletic departments as well.
In Ann Arbor, the visiting Buckeyes are greeted by a friendly athletic department representative, who guides the team to the visitors' locker room.

In Columbus, the visiting Wolverines are greeted by not-so-friendly attack dogs, in a "security measure" that Ohio State takes against no other team. That' s a bit excessive, especially when the hardened criminals usually hail from Columbus (insert your own Maurice Clarett joke here).

But when your all-time record against Michigan is 39-57-6, you need every unfair advantage you can get. At least that's how the screwed-up thinking goes in Bucknut country.

Michigan boasts some of the most iconic traditions in sports. Touching the Go Blue banner. Winged helmets. The world's greatest fight song: "The Victors."

What do you guys have? A fat tuba player who high-steps to dot the 'i' in a script Ohio. Wow. I can feel the goosebumps already. Which by the way. you couldn't even come up with that lame-ass tradition on your own. The Michigan Marching Band invented the script Ohio formation in 1932.

So yeah Today is another day in the Michigan-Ohio State rivalry, and the game is beign played on the one year anniversary of our Beloved Bo's death....so do the man proud today boys.....GO BLUE!!!
Oh and the punch line to the joke of how to get an OSU grad off your front porch..........pay him for the pizza!!!! Snap!

Cruel As School Children

I asked my students to do some free writing and this is what I got from one of my students...not all my students are learning disabled in writing, actually some are quite good at it as in this example. However it did choke me up to read, sometimes I just wish kids just weren't kids, and well for once didn't do the stereotypical kid things. It's tough enough to grow up these days, but to be an outsider looking in is doubly hard. Sometimes I just want to suck the adolescent brains out of these kids and shove an adult one into them, but when you think about it us adults can be just as bad, hell just look at half my blog posts. But as adults we are "big kids" and we can take the abuse better...It doesn't make it right it just makes it what it is.


There is a fat kid who is laughed at every day he goes to school, and every day he is made fun of and everyday he goes home and cries. He's fat, he admits it . He tries to lose weight and nothing works. He has zits and uncool hair and sometimes he doesn't always smell the best in the world. He acts like it doesn't hurt him, walks by , eyes down, mouth closed. Doesn't respond to the remarks. On the outside, it looks like he doesn't care, but on the inside his stomach is in knots and there is a lump in his throat. Every time he's called a new name it slices like a paper cut. He's quite good at keeping his emotions bottled up.

When this kid goes home to his trailer park house, he goes right to his computer, where he is not ridiculed because of his physical appearance. If you were on the outside looking in, you might think this kid is kinda weird or even antisocial. But he's really just a regular kid, who wants some friends, even just one friend, who might pick him for a team just once, or not groan and roll their eyes when they are assigned to sit next to him in class. He just wants someone to ask him to his house to skateboard or play computer games,,or might just call me by my real name for once.

WoW

Just realized that I have posted over a hundred posts this year, I am a complete pro at talking about absolutely nothing of signifigance. Gold star for me.